Ok, so I've missed a few days of journaling and honestly, I've fallen off my plan some. I'm still doing good with eating less junk and more of the healthy stuff. But I have been horrible with adding in exercise.
I was really good for the first 2 days, but now I just don't want to. Even though I know I need to.
SO...how am I going to make this work for me? and how am I going to stay motivated?
There's not a magic answer to these questions. The only way to make this happen is to get off my fucking fat ass and make myself do it!
But what if I don't want to? Too bad
What if I don't feel good? too bad
What if I'm sore? too bad
I have to get up and force myself to put in the work. And you know what I've now discovered? I love the way I feel after I put in the work. Does that mean that this will ever get easier? NO! I'm always going to have days that I hate making myself do the work. I'm always going to have days that I want to devour the entire package of cookies and drink a 12 pack of pop. And I will have days that I will cave and not workout, not restrain from eating the junk. But I will not let myself be completely defeated. I will keep working on myself and after the days that I have let myself down, I will most likely cry in the shower. However, after a good cry, I will pull on my big girl panties and face myself in the mirror.
And I will do what I should have always been doing every day.
I will tell myself that I am enough and I am worthy. God has created me and with that knowledge, I know that I will keep fighting and keep moving forward to become the healthy and happy version of my that I have always been meant to be. After all, God didn't create me just for me to be a miserable, lazy person.
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